Clive’s Album of the Year, 2022

2022 was a while back now, I realise, but I’ve had other things on my mind in 2023 besides ranking my favourite albums of the previous year. 2023 did, in fact, suck. Maybe one day I’ll talk about that. But not now.

In 2022 I finally got to go to two arena gigs that were postponed from 2020, Lady Gaga and My Chemical Romance. They were both amazing shows, and I went to both on my own, as the people who were to come with me couldn’t make the new dates. The Gaga show was an incredible spectacle that I won’t forget, but the MCR show was an absolutely awesome gig and probably the highlight of my year. I just hope they put out an album. 🙏

The world population reached the 8 billion mark in 2022. Eight billion. Russia invaded Ukraine beginning a war which is still ongoing at time of writing and which has been condemned internationally, particularly in the west. Q-Tip celebrated her Platty Joobs, which was only the second most significant event in her calendar that year, as she then went on to die in September. A mixed bag there. Space Karen bought Twitter for $44bn, BogJob resigned, someone had another go at killing Salman Rushdie, floods devastated Pakistan, Liz Truss became Prime Minister of the UK, Rishi Sunak became Prime Minister of the UK, and ChatGPT was birthed.

Those patting down their pockets to find their ethereal keys and then heading outside to the astral car park included Sidney Poitier, Meat Loaf 🦠, Barry Cryer, Bamber Gascoigne, Shane Warne, William Hurt, Peter Bowles, Taylor Hawkins, C.W. McCall, June Brown, Pamela Rooke, Terry off of Minder (Dennis Waterman), Vangelis, Ray Liotta, Alec John Such, Julee Cruise, Brett Tuggle, James Caan, James Lovelock, Bernard Cribbins, Lt. Uhura (Nichelle Nichols), Issey Miyake, Olivia Newton-John, Raymond Briggs, Mikhail Gorbachev, Queen Elizabeth II, Nurse Ratched (Louise Fletcher), Coolio, Loretta Lynn, Angela Lansbury, Robbie Coltrane, Jerry Lee Lewis, Leslie Phillips, Wilko Johnson, Christine McVie, Kirstie Alley, Ruth Madoc, Maxi Jazz, John Bird, Pelé, Vivienne Westwood and Pope Benedict the XVIth.

The one-liners

• Alter Bridge – Pawns & Kings. (Heavy rock/metal.) Another solid album from Kennedy, Tremonti et al., though perhaps they are beginning to all sound a bit samey. Still good though.
• Halestorm – Back From the Dead. (Hard rock.) Lzzy Hale and her gang doing what they do best.
• Jean-Michel Jarre – Oxymore. (World/ambient/new age.) A more ambient side of J-MJ. If that’s what you want, then… um… this is that.
• King’s X – Three Sides of One. (Rock.) Dug Pinnick is 73. He still sounds amazing.
• MASTER BOOT RECORD - PERSONAL COMPUTER. (Electronic metal). Entirely electronic, but more like heavy metal than a lot of heavy metal. Allegedly “the artist claims that a computer itself has made all of the music as if it is sentient”. So, there’s that. Reminds me of the original soundtrack to Doom.
• Megadeth – The Sick, the Dying… and the Dead!. (Metal/thrash.) Yes, Dave Mustaine is still sneering down the mic at us all and he still doesn’t like the government. Kiko’s solos are worth the price of admission alone.
• Mr. Fastfinger - Flight Mode. (Instrumental.) The sprightly Finn returns with ten more tracks of his wonderful compositions. Always fun.
• Placebo – Never Let Me Go. (Alt-rock.) I’d never really gotten into Placebo but when I saw them supporting My Chemical Romance live in 2022 they were great. This is a good record. Moody.
• Porcupine Tree – Closure/Continuation. (Prog rock.) Brit-prog god Steven Wilson returns to his band format for their 11th long-player. Good stuff.
• Queensrÿche – Digital Noise Alliance. (Hard rock.) I still can’t get over how much Todd sounds like Geoff, if I’m honest.
• Shinedown – Planet Zero. (Rock.) I mean, if you like that sort of thing then it’s fine. Concepty too, if that helps?
• Devin Townsend – Lightwork. (Prog metal, maybe?) Not quite as mad as Empath, but up that end of the wackometer. Some utterly beautiful moments on this one. Recommend.
• Steve Vai – Inviolate. (Instrumental rock.) Not sure how many more Vai albums I’m going to go for. Where Joe Satriani seems to have found a lot more mojo lately, Steve seems to be wandering more esoteric paths. Noodly.
• Ed Wynne & Gre Vanderloo – Tumbling Through the Floativerse. (Psychedelic instrumental rock.) Remember when Ed released a solo album that was basically just like Ozric Tentacles? Quite like that. As in, exactly like that.

So. Onward.

Honourable mentions

Amorphis - Halo

I’ve loved these Finnish folkish metallers since I first heard Skyforger in 2009, and every album they’ve released since then has gone into heavy rotation as soon as it came out. Halo is no exception. Fabulous. Top track: “On the Dark Waters”

Architects - The Classic Symptoms of a Broken Spirit

Architects are from Brighton, they don’t drink, and they’re vegans. Despite all of that, they’re absolutely awesome. They romped home with the top prize for AotY 2021, as you may or may not, and here they are again the very next year with another absolute utter slab of an album. This is some primo metalcore, and you can take that to the bank. Top track: “When We Were Young”

Coheed and Cambria - Vaxis II: A Window of the Waking Mind

There’s very little left to say about Coheed and Cambria, other than pointing out how absolutely remarkable it is that they are still putting out flawless albums. If semi-sci-fi-themed prog rock does it for you, then you should be listening to them non-stop. Brilliant. Top track: “A Disappearing Act”

Crashdïet - Automaton

These Swedish glamsters have had a patchy run of it, to be honest. Their first album (Rest in Sleaze, 2005) was very promising if a little naive, but then the singer committed suicide. They borrowed the lead singer from Reckless Love for the second one (The Unattractive Revolution, 2007) and that was OK, but then Olli Herman went back to his main band. They found another singer (who I thought was a bit of a cock) and did another couple of albums, but by that time I’d tuned out. I didn’t really think about them until they popped up on the Tube of You one day with another new singer, and a really good sound. This album is great from start to nuts, and a guest spot from Steel Panther’s Michael Starr does no harm. Top track: “No Man’s Land”

Polyphia - Remember That You Will Die

This is a tricky one, given that I don’t like about half the tracks on it. Much has been made of late about the “trick cyclist” guitar skills of wunderkind Tim Henson and the equally dextrous Scottie LePage, and there is no denying their technique is mind-blowing. Add to that the absolutely unpossible drumulation from Clay Aeschliman, in which I feel that Tim and the others write the hardest possible trap/hip-hop beats in an effort to create something he can’t play. If that’s the case, they haven’t managed it yet. But… well, it’s an album of at least two halves. See, no-one in the band sings and most of their music is instrumental. That’s great. I love that. (I also do that, in case I haven’t mentioned it…) But the Texas quartet aren’t happy to leave it there and give us forty minutes of wailage and enriffment. No. Instead they recruit guest vocalists for 5 out of the 12 songs. Again, nothing wrong with that. Your man Chino off of Deftones is one of them, and that track (“Bloodbath”) is wonderful. Where Polyphia lose me is when they recruit rappers and other “young people’s music” vocalists such as Sophia Black, Killstation, Lil West and $not. Thing is, I’m 50, and I’m not the target audience for those songs, and that’s fine! Honestly. I love the other tracks enough to still put this album in my AotY 2022 shortlist. My skip button works perfectly well, and I love the instrumental tracks and “Bloodbath”. Check the video for a guest spot from Steve Vai. Top track: “Ego Death”

Michael Romeo - War of the Worlds pt. 2

Well, we had to wait four years for part 2, but it was worth the wait. More of the same, to be honest with you, with one change: vocals this time round are provided by Croatian singer Dino Jelusic, who we last saw round these parts in 2020, knocking about with George Lynch on his band project Dirty Shirley. Dino has a hell of a voice, and Romeo’s arrangements and solos are impeccable as ever. Don’t try to pecc them, YOU WILL FAIL. Top track: “Metamorphosis”

Joe Satriani - The Elephants of Mars

OK so, Satch is important to me, so listen up. I play instrumental rock guitar, as you might know. I even released my second album in early 2024. (Did I mention that?) And the reason I started playing that kind of music was when my guitar teacher back in Eastbourne played 15-year-old me the title track from Surfing With the Alien, and my mind came clean off. I mean, the world changed. Up until that day I wanted to play rock songs like Dire Straits and Queen and blues like Eric Clapton and Robert Cray, but on hearing “Surfing”, everything shifted. Before long, I started to wonder if maybe one day I might be able to play something like that. It seemed impossible then, given I couldn’t quite get my hands around the riff for “Money For Nothing” at that time, but I did always think that maybe one day I might make that kind of music. And so I did. That is why Satch means more to me than Steve Vai, or Paul Gilbert, or Brian May, or anyone else. I got the tab books, and I learned the easy tracks first, and worked up to the harder ones over the years. Then I got a 4-track and a drum machine and started to try and write my own tunes, and the rest is (a lot of) history. So that’s why Satch matters. And that’s why it hurt so much, when in the early 2000s, he began to absolutely suck. Crystal Planet (1998) is an objectively brilliant album. Perhaps only The Extremist (1992) tops it in Joe’s entire ouvre. But… well. Engines of Creation (2000) is patchy and divisive, and I like a lot of it… Strange Beautiful Music (2002) has some great tracks, but a lot of filler… and after that it all just started to sound the same. I think Super Colossal (2006) was the last one I bought, and I absolutely hated it, and swore that I would never go back. After that I would copy or torrent his albums just to check them out, listen to about half of it, and then delete the whole thing. I was out. But then, in 2018, something made me check in and have a little listen to Joe’s album that year What Happens Next, and I was pretty surprised to find that I liked it. Didn’t love it, it didn’t make the AotY shortlist, but I liked it. OK, fair enough. Then in 2022, Joe blew me and my opinions out of the water with this album The Elephants of Mars, and ladies let me tell you this is proper Joe once again. The Joe of old. Experimental Joe, not “here are 7 mid-tempo major-key tunes and a couple of jam songs” Joe. This is his best work since Crystal Planet without a doubt. Try it, maybe buy it. I did. Top track: “Sailing the Seas of Ganymede”

Skid Row - The Gang’s All Here

If you’re anything like me—and I know I am—then you were well into Skid Row back in their heyday of the late 80s/early 90s. In fact the first proper gig I went to was the Skids at London Docklands, supported by both Love/Hate and L.A. Guns, as they launched their magnificent octopus Slave to the Grind. Well, that was in 1991 and they’ve been through a hefty batch of singers since then, including ZP Theart off of DragonForce for a bit, and are now fronted by the excellent Erik Grönwall. Erik made his name by winning Swedish Idol 2009, singing Skid Row tunes among others, and now he’s their lead singer. Which is awesome. Top track: “Resurrected”

Taylor Swift - Midnights

It should come as no surprise by now (if you’ve been paying attention) when a girly pop singer grabs me just as much as the hardest of rockers or the nimblest of guitar players. I am an unashamed Little Monster and Swifty as well as being a rocker and a shredder. People can be more than one thing, you know? Anyhow, TayTay’s 2022 album Midnights grabbed me so hard it was album of the year for a few months, but I think I kind of wore it out by overplaying it. It’s still fabulous, though. A little less folksy than the previous couple of albums with some lovely dream-pop tendencies (“Lavender Haze”, “Snow on the Beach”), it’s still on heavy rotation here. Top track: “Lavender Haze”

And the winner is…

Reckless Love - Turborider

Stranger Things has a lot to answer for.

Is that fair? Perhaps not. 80s revivals come around every now and then, and there’s nothing new under the sun, so it’s only natural that once in a while there will be a sudden resurgence of pink and blue neon album covers and a rush to download synthwave plugins and LinnDrum sample packs.

Back in 2019, album of the year went to the mighty McRocklin & Hutch with their genius shredwave album Riding Out, which remains the high water mark for 80s-movie-and-video-game-styled-synth-and-shred-guitar albums. Honestly, it’s brilliant, and still sounds just as fresh five years later.

Anyway, they weren’t the only ones catching the retro wave. Gus G had a go, so did Muse, and I’m sure there have been a whole load more that I haven’t noticed, and I do feel that a fair amount of this is thanks to the specific brand of 80s nostalgia that Stranger Things conjures.

Enter stage left, Reckless Love.

I became aware of these Finnish glamsters some time in the early 2010s during one of my (many) “glam metal is the only true music” phases. I think I’d just discovered Crashdïet, Gemini Five, Babylon Bombs and a bunch of other Scandi-rock outfits, and RL fit right in with them all. And then, like a lot of these bands, I discovered that once I sobered up and gave them a proper listen, there wasn’t much to them. A few decent riffs, a (not always) decent-ish singer, a lot of hairspray, and not a great deal else. Oh well. I moved on and didn’t listen to them again for some time.

Until 2022, in fact, when I was made aware of TurboRider. Have a little look at that album cover again, won’t you? What does that say to you? What does that subtly hint at, in such a deft way that you almost didn’t spot it at first, but once you do, it’s there for sure, and it’s really clever?

Nothing. But what it screeches at you is “GET YOUR 80S ROCK HERE, BIG BOY!”

But this is where it does actually get clever. This is not just a modern glam metal album with some synth chucked at it. By which I mean, it definitely is that, but there is more to it, thanks to producer Joonas Parkkonen (who was one of the guitarists in Santa Cruz and has produced albums for many other Scandi rock and metal bands such as Lost Society and Apocalyptica).

For one thing, TurboRider is extremely hard-rock-literate. In almost every song there are references and nods to 80s classics. In the lyrics, the production, the riffs, even the guitar sounds. For example, “Kids of the Arcade” features the line “we ain’t the worst that you’ve seen” which is lifted directly from “Jump” by Van Halen (1984). The one that kept leaping out at me in the car (my son loves this album and it’s often the soundtrack to the school-run) is the guitar lick at 0:52 in “Outrun”. That comes straight out of David Lee Roth’s “Just Like Paradise” (1988). It’s even the same guitar tone. The pre-solo lick from “Beat It” (1983) is buried in “Like a Cobra”… there are plenty more for those with but the ears to find them.

There is even a (well executed but maaaaaybe superfluous) cover of Ozzy Osbourne’s “Bark at the Moon” (1983), in case you weren’t getting the point.

So, one thing should be pretty clear by now – if you don’t dig 80s glam/hard rock, then this album probably won’t ring your fire or light your bell. But if that does sound like something you might enjoy, then you won’t find a better-executed example of retro-focussed glamrockwave out there. The lyrics are exactly what you would expect (in fact, while they aren’t perfect, they’re perhaps less misogynistic than the songs and/or albums to which homage is paid, this is 2022 after all), the musicianship is solid, the vocals and the solos all do exactly what you hope they would, and the production is absolutely spot on. All of this executed with one foot in 1985 and the other in 2022, with a knowing nod and a wink to the classics without just slavishly copying them, and somehow it all works flawlessly.

For some reason that eludes me, YouTube won’t let me embed the video for the title track “TurboRider” here. 🤷‍♀️

Top tracks: “Eyes of a Maniac”, “Kids of the Arcade”, “Outrun”

Turkey of the Year

Star One - Revel in Time

Good god, no.